Story Thread

[Slayer]

C'mon, I bet you all know how this goes...


I'll start a story, and each poster continues it.

I'm betting it'll take about three replies to turn pornographic...

Well, here goes (And I'm no Marian Keyes).

She picked up the photograph from the dressing table, and traced the smiling faces. She held it close to her breast, then threw it across the room, and watched as the happy faces were blurred by spiderwebbed glass...

"She says she still sings." -Cassie BtVS

[candlemansa]

From another room a voice filled with anxiety called out to her.
"Jeanna, dear, are you all right!"
Jeanna sighed feeling her frustration ebb as quickly away as the anger had flared up.
"Fine Grandma," she called, "just knocked over a picture,". Glancing around the musty victorian sitting room she searched for something to pick up the shards of broken glass. Next to old bundles of newspapers there lay a small shovel. Swiftly she crossed the room and bent down to pick up the rusted handle. Her eyes briefly swept over the cover of the first newspaper. Even in her preoccupied state the words seemed to penetrate, and with mounting shock her eyes returned to the headline. The date of the newspaper was from thirty years earlier and ........
Not sure if thats the way you want to go slayer but you can change it back to whatever

[KTS]

... and meanwhile, in the bedroom upstairs, Jeanna´s mother lay on her bed, the room in darkness with drapes pulled tight, and a cool wash cloth across her forehead. In the grip of a painful migraine, she moaned and turned on her side. She was unaware, that downstairs, Jeanna was about to stumble upon the secret - the dark secret of the family. And all because of a carelessly mislaid newspaper. Jeanna was about to find out all about Edward, his relationship with her mother, the goats that drowned, and the true root behind the migraines that plagued poor Delia Johnson.

[Slayer]

It had been a long winter in 73, and a cold one..

It had seemed so innocent.

Goat tipping was all the rage, and the kids were bored.

They never guessed the massacre they would cause...

"She says she still sings." -Cassie BtVS

[amnesiac]

or the feelings they would develop for these most underrated of animals. The goats. Kinky as hell them dar goats.

You should have stayed at the party Maxine.

[odyssey_scot]

[lol, you were right, 4 posts and its already into beastiality. anyways, here's my addition..]

One would think that goats, a newspaper, a migraine and a family secret would be unlinked (well, actually in most families, you probably could link a member (family member that is...lol..) to goats, or at least sheep)

But '73 had been a tough year in Ballyshipflan, and the noises from the moor (do we have moors in ireland?) had disturbed the animals no end. There'd been the cattle stampede through nearby Dunferrance (hey, how easy is it to make up fake Irish towns..), the attack on Mrs. O' Neill by those crows, and the unfortunate incident concerning the death of Father Breen, involving field mice.
The people of Ballyshipflan had tried to quell rumours of ghosts on the moors, blaming it on the bad weather, "Ara, shur ya know, animals are terrible sensitive to bad weather, shur",
or on the New Age farmers that had moved in up the road, "Shur, ya don't know what *those* people would be up ta..."

But the kids knew, they'd seen *it*. They'd tried to tell Father Breen, but he hadn't listened. "Nonsense", he'd said, "the Lord Jesus Christ would never allow such beasts to exist in this fair land".

But exist they did, and evil they were, which I suppose is what you get for...ummm...*mating* with goats, a humangoat, or perhaps a goathuman (details, details, we'll sort that later). It was like something from ancient literature, and it certainly was barbaric (wearing plaid? with a pink jumper? simply awful)..

[KTS]

(me again - moving the thread away from the past and sex and onto violence)

But the past is something we will come back to later in this story ... Back in the present, Jeanna stood in shock, gripping the newspaper in her hands, her knuckles slowly turning white.

A sound behind her startled her and she whirled around, dropping the newspaper in the process.

A dark-cloaked figure lunged at her, raising a large knife in a deadly arc and swinging it down towards her...

Jeanna ducked, and the figure crashed against the mantle.

Screaming in terror, Jeanna ran from the figure, her heart triphammering in her chest, her adrenaline soaring, her breath caught in her throat...

The figure sprinted after her, as she raced across the living room. "Now you know the secret," it said in a wheezy but oddly familiar voice, "you must die..."

"Gran! Mam! Help me!" Jeanna screamed.

Little did she know that her grandmother lay on the kitchen floor, her throat slit, a pool of blood slowly spreading around her body and pooling on the white-tiled floor.

Upstairs, however her mother Delia stirred, and awoke from her migraine-disturbed sleep.

"Jeanna..." she said - but a black-gloved hand covered her mouth.

(Are there two attackers...)

[Tom RED]

Delia was just about to scream but then noticed that the culprit had not two but only one black glove on, looking closer it looked kind of familiar. It had rhinestones sewn into it which were sparkling from the moonlight coming through the window. It was a reddish moon, like something from a thriller on tv. Slowly the intruder removed his hand gently and starting talking to her but the voice didn't sound bad or dangerous, it was very unique and more like an effeminate whisper.

It reminded her of someone and no she thought, it couldn't be! Not not since around the time of the artificial insemenation had she heard such a voice, could it really be!

Delia the voice whispered.....I'm Micheal Jackson and I'm here to help you.

My sister Latoya is down stairs and has gone Off the Wall crazy, she was listening to to too many Marlyn Manson records again! We gotta moonwalk out of here and beat it!

•••••••••••
†Om ®ed
•••••••••••

[setanta]

"But what about Jeanna, We have to save her" cried Delia her breasts heaving underneath the tight bodice.
"I'm afraid it might be too late by now " shrieked Michael as he grabbed his crotch and yelped.
"Get away from me you freak" shouted Delia and she bolted for the door.
Jackson lunged after her with his talon like fingers, Delia grabbed the large paraffin lamp on the bedside locker and flung it at him. In an instant the ghoulish figure before her was a mass of molten pulp on the floor, the reeking silicone now with Rhinestone pebbles covering the luxourious persian rug given to Delai by the handsome, brave, well endowed yet sensitive Sultan of Akbar.
She ran out the door to the landing, if only the Sultan was here to help her now, him and his loyal, muscular, handsome, goatherd,the boy called Chad.



___life is for the daring darling___

[Tom RED]

Suddenly Delia heard footsteps coming up the stairs. Delia froze she didn't know what to do but to hide in her old wardrobe by the bed and hope for the best. She jumped in and closed the wardrobe door quickly. 'Creak', sounded the floorboards outside the bedroom. It was bloodthirsty Latoya Jackson who will go even more crazy whe she sees her brother beaten to a plastic pulp on the floor .....or maybe not.

Latoya desparately wanted fame like her other siblings but it always eluded her. She tried so hard to sing but she hadn't note in her head. She always felt inferior to Micheal and Janet "why cant I have a number one record", she moaned. She even got advice off Danni Minogue who lived in the shadow of her sister Kylie. She just couldnt get it out of her head the voices repeated over and over "Failure, failure! .....Latoya the nobody. She knew what she had to do after listening to a Marilyn Manson record about Charles Manson who was more famous for his murder of 60's celebrity Sharon Tate than his music. While Marilyn was also more famous for his notoriety rather than his music. "Kill!" the voices in her head said "Kill Kill Kill!" they repeated. So she HAD to find and KILL Delia Smith 'the celebrity chef'. 'This will get her in the papers', she thought '...and nothing is going to get in my way'.

Delia pushed the clothes in the wardrobe in front of her hoping to conceal her if Latoya opened the wardrobe.The sound of the footsteps were getting nearer and nearer her heart was palpitating so fast it was like one continous beat. Deeeeeeeeeliaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh ha ha ah ah haa wheeeeere are you bitch!' screamed Latoya.
Delia panicked and fell backwards towards the wall of the wardrobe but there was no wall just complete darkness. Silence.

She no longer could hear psycho Latoya. Delia had to pinch herself to see if she was alive or dreaming she had no wounds. What happened?. it began to dwan on her that she was now after returning to the place she always dreamt of since childhood. Dreams that felt so real the child psychiatrist told her then she was ill. She was back. The darkness faded around her, replaced by white snow.

Delia said a strange word to herself like she was familiar with but had forgotten. 'Narnia'

•••••••••••
†Om ®ed
•••••••••••

[KTS]

(This is turning into some camp thriller a la "The Rocky Horror Picture Show". Keep it up folks! Maybe we can all get published. A book called SO BAD IT´S GOOD perhaps? 0 SHADOWS X)

[candlemansa]

Jeanna shrank back against the old grandfather clock as the lights flickered briefly before plunging the house into darkness. Holding her hand tightly against her mouth she slid down the wall and crouched listening intently for signs of her attacker. Footsteps pounded on the stairs, every creak sending goosepimples racing across her pale skin. "We've got Delia," a deep voice hissed.
"What about the daughter?" another voice replied.
"Forget her, its Delia he wants,"
Screaming Delia was dragged down the stairs passed her daughter who had gone unnoticed. The front door was thrown wide and she was pulled into the dark night. Jeanna stayed where she was till the sounds of the escaping car were long gone. Unsteadily she got her feet and stumbled into the Kitchen. Her Grandmothers sightless eyes glared back at her in the silver moonlight that streamed in through a crack in the threadbare curtain. The scream that had been building in her throat was released. Sobbing she pulled open the kitchen door and emptied the contents of her stomach over her dogs water bowl. She needed to get help. Turning back into the Kitchen she tried the phone but a severed connection was expected and they didn't disappoint. If she ran she could reach the nearest neighbor in under fifteen minutes but it meant taking the short cut through the haunted moors. Jeanna had never taken seriously the rumors of half human, half goat like creatures that stalked the moors, and as a practical capricorn of which her symbol was the same, she knew no harm would come to her. Yet as her eyes scanned the dark shadows that drifted across the boggy wastelands she couldn't help but feel a moments trepidition.
"Come on get a grip," she whispered hoarsely. Delia needed her. This journey had to take place.

[Slayer]

Meanwhile, across town, chaos was brewing...


The town's chiefs had been expecting carnage, but the scene that greeted them as the stepped into the parking lot went beyone their worst nightmares...

"Oh my God, it's Justin Timberlake!!"

Screamed one of the victims, as she jostled for the shaved head one's attention...

The sheriff turned to his deputy.

"What kind of monster would create such chaos?"



"She says she still sings." -Cassie BtVS

[odyssey_scot]

yes, indeed it were Justin Timberlake, but little did they know he was descended from the goat-human monsters of '73, who had evolved to become pretty much human, apart from high pitched voices and exceptionally nimble feet.

Yes it was Timberlake, and he was back to take revenge..

[amnesiac]

... to avenge the persecution his fiddle-playing goat ancestors had suffered in the Great Bogholes during the '73 persecution.

You should have stayed at the party Maxine.

[Slayer]

Goatism is a terrible thing, and life was never so cruel as to the fiddle playing goats.

Jeanna knew all this, the whole town did.

But noone knew what Justin had planned.
His plan was falling into place.


His mic was ready, and he began to sing...

And one by one the crowd began to drop...

"She says she still sings." -Cassie BtVS

[redbulljunkie]

The crowd at the mtv music awards gasped and sipped their champagne as they watched this spectacle unfold before them. Where was Sean William Scott, hired as the voice of reason to calm Justin's melodic rage? Jeanna prayed silently that Kylie would appear on the scene and provide her ass as a distraction but alas there was only one way she could be saved...

[amnesiac]

... and that involved presenting an award for Best Goat Impersonation in Music to the wicked witch of the Frozen North, Celine Dion and not the lady whose name was printed inside the envelope, the wicked witch of the morgue, Cher.
Jeanna, licked her parched lips as she caught Celine's cold eye in Row 14
"And the nominees are..."

[redbulljunkie]

Everyone was speechless at this astonishing sight. Celine and Cher looked radiant, beautiful and eternally young while backstage portraits made of them became ever more ugly and grotesque...

[amnesiac]

ANOTHER Dorian Grey ref?

[redbulljunkie]

"What the fuck is HE on about?" the crowd asked each other bemusedly....

[amnesiac]

...as Jeanna finished reading the lsit of nominees, she felt her palms oozing juices... her own perspiration. Thankfully she was using Sure(TM), which guaranteed her 24 hours of protection. She went through the motions of opening the envelope... turned the gaudy goldne sleeve over in her hands, preied off the faux red wax seal with ease...
but with that, wearing Sure For Men(TM) Deo-Roll-ON-Stick, Justin burst on stage.
"STOP YOU FOOLS!" he cried before breaking into dance...

[Slayer]

OH MY GOD!!

The crowd screamed as he whipped off his pants (Tommy Hilfger TM) and revealed his stripy underwear(Calvin Klein TM).

[amnesiac]

The Execs in Tommy(TM) HQ dropped their jawas in disbelief. Were they hallucinating? Was Justin, the face of Tommy Hilfiger(TM) really invading the satge at an Awards Ceremony displayign a rivals product?

[Slayer]

Tommy whirled round in his chair.

He must die!

[redbulljunkie]

And with that, Tommy sent in his secret weapon. A masked figure, with black shoes and white socks. From what people could see the skin around his eyes was even whiter than Justin's. It was time for Justin to unveil his fatal dance moves, but wait, this stranger knew all his dance moves and more. Every time Justin would try a dance move, this stranger had the move already. Could this really be Justin's secret master? With his dance moves not working, it was time for Justin to try his high-pitched wail. But alas, the masked stranger's wail for far more high-pitched than anything Justin could master, it looked like Justin had met his match...

[Slayer]

the stranger twirled and grabbed his groin.

"I know who you are!!"

screamed Justin.


He grabbed the stranger's mask and ripped it off, to reveal Michael Jackson.

"Mwahaha!!"


Justin grabbed a blowtorch and watched as Michael melted into a puddle of goo...

[amnesiac]

at whioch point a division of militant goats wearing big goatey boots and carrying Uzis stormed the auditorium.
"ma-a-aeh" they screamed as they opened fire.
Justin faced the most difficult decision since chopping his locks... humans or goats....
TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS IF JUSTIN CHOOSES GOATS TURN TO PAGE 451
TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS IF JUSTIN CHOOSES HUMANS GO TO PAGE 329

[KTS]

TO VIEW THE END OF THIS STORY (AND INDEED THIS THREAD ITSELF) GO TO PAGE 99999

TO KEEP THIS THREAD ALIVE, POST A REPLY

[redbulljunkie]

I think this thread is proof that you can't make a good story by using a thousand monkeys at a thousand typewriters.

threads die KTS, accept it.

[KTS]

duly accepted