Me Myself and Coca Cola

So I decided to write a little about myself that people probably dont really/ever want to know but hey, You decided to read this ya nosey fuck up so hah!

hmmm where to start..thats a hard one..Kinda like Robert Frosts ramblings on the road not taken..once you witter off down one path then all others are forgotten..Insights, Ideas, emotions..All lost to the cosmos...

*lights a Benson*..ahh clarity of mind at only the price of ones youth..

I have only read two blogs before attempting this..Neolies and admins..Now admins I couldnt actually see because I hadnt added him as a friend and noelies was a defence against the sword of damecles methinks

Jesus im rambling..ok so im not going to claim im utterly amazing and say shit like I can divide by zero or that I can speak fluent braile or any other such bollix (even though I did count to infinity twice last wednesday) Im not perfect..I cant spell, Im sure im a cunt sometimes and my tolerence for idiots or people I have decided I dont like is about as much as hitlers was for a jewish gay transgender ginger with a striking resemblance to Josef Stalin. But hey no ones perfect right?...Well maybe theres one or two

Ok so I was a fat geek as a child...there I said it! I admit to geeky things like collecting stamps and learning all the different names of trees...although im not as bad a s my cousin who collected his farts in jars...mank!

I had a very sheltered youth..and it was my own doing...I was disgustingly shy and had terrible social skills...I suppose this kinda changed when I got into horseriding as a hobby..that of course didnt happen until I gave up hurling (when I got a quarter of my left index finger sliced off in a game) So I suppose I was about 8...maybe 7..Age is a bitch So yeah the yard was what started me on that trip to the monster I have become today haha

Oh the memories...so so so many good memories...hot summers bringing in the hay, swimming in the Finnisk river..all those friends Ive lost contact with..best friends...a crying shame..but c'est La Vie.

Girlfriends..losing my virginity...all comes about mid teens...started losing interest in horses and more in doing drugs and robbing cars...Bye Bye Innocence...we once where friends

Thankfully I got out of that horrible phase..And I now dispise drugs...you really know things are fucked up when in the same summer one person dies from inhaling aerosol cans to get high and anothers liver and internals start bleeding and their brain swells from drugs..not fun..too young.

All that I had given up..all that talent..ten years worth of practise fucked out the window just to be cool....SICK

Awards..hard earned..Recognised nationally..parents joy..irrelevant in comparison to a tog off a joint

The shit we used to get upto..SCANDALOUS..

Id fucking kick the hole off any kid of mine who done things a tenth as bad as these...

Leaving cert..amazing...best year of school I ever had..complete acceptance, popularity I used to enjoy getting up for school that year.

I wanted to be a pharmacist..all going well......my best friend dies of a freak heart attack two days after we stop talking coz of a ridiculous fight..I dont need to say any more

two more friends die in a car crash 3 mnths later..

distraught..funny how exams never mattered after that..

Day before LC..Joined the reserves..best decision of my life..

I am now slim

college..same old ding dong drink, sleep, ride the girl friend..oh wait, im gay! lol

3mnths later coming out...all gravy

LGBT..

Jesus this is way better than adrian mole lol

more college, BFs, fun times , bad times, drama..more drama

lonliness

belfast..infinate happiness

Thats my life in 3 minutes..its not exciting, its not original..but hey, its mine.

Its funny how it resembles Coca Cola.. that sweetness at the start that first gulp that makes your mouth tingle then comes the sharp fizzyness that makes you gasp, that cruel addiction that wont let you stop drinking..then you are sated..happy and are willing to enjoy the rest as it comes..my life is like Coca Cola..as with everything it comes with a price and yet it makes other people happy.

Yet I am not Coca Cola, I am me, I am a RDF corporal, I am a biochemist in the making, I love, I hate, I feel..I am man (and boy am I weird writing all this shit but I just cant stop!!) I am a gay man.

In three years time I intend on being on my way to becoming an officer in the army (permanent) I have dreams, I have fears and I have doubts. The worst thing you can be in life is afraid of another human..the worst they can do is kill you..no matter what the fashion they choose, the worst is death and IMO theres a fuck load worse than that that may happen...

there is one saying that I hold dear to me...Those who fear to try are doomed to failure and on that note, I bid you adieu and hope this gives you a little insight into my world..

F.


Edit...life has proven the very point I made that theres worse things than death is a complete crock of shit..as events of january have shown....